My Little Orange Kitchen

Love Nest

A 

My friend Kim and I are a strange duo. I can honestly say we are the most different exactly alike pair ever. So many aspects of our personalities contrast, yet it seems that we are often freakishly in-tune. Sometimes I think we wouldn't even have to have a conversation. . .words don't seem needed when you just get someone's vibe in a second or two. 

I was recently inspired by watching this and knew that Kim would be game for doing a little nature art installation of our own.

I asked her if she wanted to meet at the beach to create something like a nest and I had no idea what we'd end up with. Of course, she was all over it and she brought her daughter Molly along for the fun.

The base of the nest was made from gathered driftwood and I think it would have looked pretty all by itself, however, I was feeling so happy and dare I say, "Lovey!" that when Molly gave her final approval on the love nest idea and set about collecting red rocks for the heart in the middle...my own heart soared. I love that we took it to the next level.

Kim and I busied ourselves collecting white rocks to fill the nest and let me tell you...she's a saint because I made it very clear at a certain point that walking on sand and picking up shirt baskets filled with rocks was a workout. I may have made it clear more than once! :)

While we were working on the project, Kim and I chatted about everything from having babies and selkie stories to our struggles and positive personal realizations.

Molly eventually tired of red rock collecting, but gave me a gorgeous peice of sea pottery she found and you know this made my day! She also wandered a bit and made friends with a little girl playing nearby. The sun was shining, it was warm and we had such a nice afternoon. I just love how much Kim gives her the space she needs to explore and grow.

It was a nice time and I love that we made something impermanent, out of found materials and within a short period of time.  I hope people walking on the beach see it and get a smile.

Speaking of which...this little smiley bird in the nest was worth all the rock hauling in the world!!

Full Flower Dreamboard

Today is the full flower moon and I was inspired by Jamie Ridler to create a dreamboard. The theme is who are you when you are in full flower? My honest answer is, "I have no clue." I don't know that I've ever been in full flower, so in a way it is kind of exciting, but I don't need to rush it...I like blossoming just fine. :)

I used the book boards of a vintage atlas as my base which seemed appropriately symbolic for something that represents a part of me I haven't been to yet. I chose images that spoke to me (sprinkles, doors, keys, flowers) and phrases that seem right. Full flower me is totally comfortable being creative and goes for it...whatever it is. Full flower me has energy, lovely skin, learns by doing and is just the perfect size.

Another theme is that full flower me knows her style. I am trying to find my personal style and still so unsure.

I've been great with my exercise and in a big way...CrossFit is amazing and the improvement in just over two weeks is incredible.  Heather is doing so much for me too...my confidence is growing, though this morning I was a big crab and I actually swore at CrossFit yesterday--ALOUD-MORE THAN ONCE! Not that this is good, but I think I'm releasing some old emotions from muscle that has not been dug into in years!

I've broken down some big walls and am proud of myself. The next step is to work on the food. Exercise great...food-needs some work.

I encourage all of you to think about who you are when you are in full flower? And if you are a guy...you can be in the fullest most masculine looking flower ever...it's not just a "lady thing". :)

HOPE

'Hope' is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul - And sings the tune without words And never stops - at all.

Emily Dickinson

Sunday

I got up this morning and went for a short walk to the lake. I feel lucky to be so close to water.  It was cold and windy, but the waves were beautiful.

I planned to get a coffee or some tea at Mojo, but forgot that on Sundays it is hit or miss. I love this place and the coffee is so good!

Today is a work day, no doubt. I have been very busy getting caught up...is that becoming my most often written phrase on the blog? :)

I saw these on my walk today and fell in love.

I wanted to share something that may make some of you cringe and yell, "TMI!!!" at the top of your lungs, but I think some of you local women may be privately happy.

I am self-conscious getting some spa services like bikini waxing for example or full body mud wraps. However, about a few  years ago I decided that I needed to get over this and wrote out a Universe Request card (I just make my own) asking to find my waxing soul mate. It went into a Spirit bowl a friend made for me (out of a gourd) and I waited for the Universe to show-off and of course...it did.

Her name is Lisha and I've been seeing her for a long time.  She makes me feel 100% comfortable being naked from the waist down and in all kinds of crazy contortions that no one but someone you are intimate with should ever see you in!!! Whether you just want a little touch-up or a full on Brazilian, she's your girl. She's kind, sensitive to body image issues, funny and basically -- she's me if I happened to be an esthetician.  I really think I'd be good at making people feel relaxed and safe and so if you know me...you know her. She's the best! :) She told me she does men as well, so if you there is a man in your life who wants some help...she's his girl too!

If you've always wanted to try, but have been too self-conscious to dare...she's the one.  Please mention I referred you because I'll get a deal on future services.  She used to be at Indira in Green Bay, but now she works out of both the Neenah and Appleton Salon Aura locations. Her name is pronounced lee-shah. If you have any questions or are nervous...just message me privately.

OK, another service and a completely different one...are you relieved? :) I mentioned in my most recent post that if I get stuck on some goals that I'd consider hiring a project coach to help me move past the issue. Yes, I KNOW this could be indulgent, but I think sometimes a little boost from a non-attached someone can help you go all out on a project that you've been dragging your feet on.

Jamie Ridler now offers such help for $125.00.  It may seem like a lot, but not for the relief of getting that business plan done or getting those tracks for your new cd laid down or finally getting the much thought about etsy shop opened.  It's your project, but a little help is nice. Full disclosure, I have not used Jamie yet, but I plan to.  It's an hour on the phone and she has many many many happy clients...many of whom you probably already know through their books and blogging. I found out about her one-time sessions through her newsletter, but I see they are not on her blog yet...so I'd just message her if you are interested at [email protected] 

Well, take care and enjoy your Sunday before it all too quickly disappears!

    

Completion and Goals With Dreams

 

Since the winter I've had some personal life issues that I haven't shared here, which could come as a surprise since I share everything, but these things have felt more private.  Anyway, these issues have gotten in the way of how I work and I've had some professional failures because of it.

Don't be to hard on me for using the word failure...honestly. Sometimes one must be accountable for one's actions plain and simple. I can say that I've learned so much because of it. I've learned that my work environment is everything, that I'm too old to pull-off all nighters and be OK for a week following, fantastic streamlining of some of my processes and that I have a big issue with completion. I don't let myself get the win...ever.

I won't launch into a big personal history, but let's just say it started with dropping out of high school and has carried on in many ways since. There are a couple of factors working here.  Actually, more than a couple. The main thing is fragility and deservability.

I've always had a hard time concentrating on the tasks at hand when my environment isn't right or when I have personal things happening. I've always marveled at parents of very sick children who somehow manage to hold down jobs and go about life because they have to. I don't know if I could. I can easily see myself holing up in the hospital and never leaving. 

I feel like my emotional shell isn't a shell at all, but a very thin web of fragility and the slightest thing can shut me down for weeks! It's odd because when I am strong, I'm a rock, but when I'm not I melt like a popsicle in the sun and even faster. I can work with it, but I know it will take some time. I could start by having less lofty goals. Goals I can actually finish. Does anyone out there have goals that have their own dreams? My goals need their own life coaches just to even think about being accomplished! :)

The second issue is one of deservability. I've written about this before, but maybe not enough because I KNOW I'm not alone. On some level I don't feel worthy of all the goodness heaped upon me. I have some real issues with this, so it means I deny myself the big moments of satisfaction or happiness (professionally and personally) because I don't think I've been good enough to deserve them. It isn't entirely unconscious behavior anymore which sucks in a big way! Please, denial is nice and yet it delays healing.

I decided that while I work on this wallet order and set about with some finishing that I'd create some smaller goals for the rest of the year. Goals that are reasonable. You know, like walk a mile before you announce your goal to hike the Appalachian Trail backwards and barefoot in one month. :)

May: Complete the Crossfit On-Ramp (bravo me! I'm halfway there!), buy organic plants for the garden and get them in the ground.

June: Have the studio clean and cleared out even if not officially "done" so that when I come home from Manhattan surging with the ambition to create I have a place to do so. Camp for a few days (camping charges me up).

July: Stick with personal training and CrossFit. I don't have to be perfect... I just need to stick with it. Take this class and attend this soul nurturing retreat.

August: Make one pinwheel to go with the great pinwheel project. If I haven't already, finish my embroidery sampler.  Make herbal sun tea.

September: Evaluate where I am with holiday stock for both my etsy shops and wallet customers.  If I feel behind, talk it out and hire a coach to help me with this one thing. I like the idea of someone who helps you tackle one project with intensity.

October: Make a gorgeous fall window display, watch movies and enjoy tea and Paleo Banana bread on at least one weekday off every week of the month. Fall is my favorite season...I don't want to miss feeling cozy. Take this class. Doesn't it sound wonderful? Yes, I know how, but I don't live it...so a class could be helpful.

November: Camp at least once. Host at least one studio open house-DO NOT worry about the condition of the studio. It will be beautiful.

December:  Meet my holiday order deadlines. Then close the shop between Christmas Eve and January 1st without guilt or regret if the season didn't go as well as I hope.

OK. These are doable things and even though they are not the only things on my list of what I hope to do...they are things I feel I deserve to do.

For now...for tonight while I work, I want to savor moments like this...hot latte delivered by Mark, good music and the comfort of knowing I have a blog and readers who won't judge me for my "failures" or for calling them "failures" because you know what I mean...

By the way...I have 2 blog crushes to share:

Jamie Ridler Studios

Persisting Stars